YOU CAN AND WILL PASS THE BAR THE FIRST TIME

I remember when one of my law school classmates told me that they had signed up for a bar prep course different from mine.  I remember the self-doubt. Did I make the right decision?

I remember when that same person started studying and they told me that they had a study group, was going to take a separate essay writing class and a separate multi-state question class that I had not signed up for.  I had only signed up for a comprehensive bar prep class (*Disclosure: I took Bar Bri and passed three bars with it – first time around). I had some self-doubt.

BUT ONLY FOR ONE SINGLE MOMENT.  And then I remembered, this:

I picked Bar Bri because my cousin – whom I respect – took Bar Bri and passed New York easily.  I remembered why I had signed up and who I was going to believe – someone who had taken the Bar and had passed it OR some fellow classmate who had not yet taken a bar or studied for one.  Why did you pick the course you signed up for? I’m betting it was because someone you respect – who passed the bar taking that course – told you to sign up. I was so confident in my cousin that I signed up for Bar Bri the first week of law school to get the savings.  She said actually “sign up at that table, keep the receipt and forget about it for three years.”  That was precisely what I did. Worked for me well.

If anything, I was over prepared. But better than the other option. 
Most people don’t just do the work in front of them.  They add other “to dos”, and “other” courses to the courses they signed up for as if all the make work of the “other” stuff is going to help them pass.  But they know the truth. There are only two things – that is right TWO things that will make you – permit you to pass:

  1. Studying the material in front of you.  Remember that course you signed up. It will cover everything if it is one of the majors. But you have not started the course yet – and so long as you did sign up for one of the big names – Bar Bri, Piepers, Princeton etc. (Here is an abovethelaw.com post about the various top courses http://abovethelaw.com/2013/05/which-bar-exam-prep-course-is-the-best-2/) but you know which ones they are.  They are the courses that the people you know who passed too.  That is the best measure of a good course.
  2. The right mindset. Without a positive, confident, winners mindset, you can’t do as well. By adding work on your mindset while you study, you magnify your chances of passing significantly.

 

 

One thing I want you to start to tell yourself, after you have begun to visualize your success is this: It is a BAR exam – something you either trip over or hit your head on. It is designed to filter out those that (a) don’t study; (b) can’t figure out how to study; or (c) those that think they can study 22 subjects the week before the exam (ie, those that don’t study.).

ARE YOU GOING TO FK UP THAT IMPORTANT MEETING, AGAIN?

Was that ever you?

This post is about how you can stop bombing important meetings, a test and even your sports games.

More specifically, I will teach you a basic technique that changed my life in many ways and brings about overall calm.  Les Paul, the famous guitar player, once said to me, “when you are called up to stage it is already too late to practice.”  So, this post is all about practice.

Here is why this is important. Can you admit that sometimes, or maybe even often, your important meetings or events have been messed up because you panicked or were anxious?

Sure you prepared what you were going to say and knew your topic cold but still things did not go well or as well as you had hoped.  You could feel it right in the middle of your talk, your test or your meeting.  You could feel it in your body.

I know it is embarrassing and uncomfortable to discuss this topic. Even if you never hit rock bottom, you did not nail it when you were “called up to the stage.”

You’re exhausted by all the energy that you have wasted from anxiety and feelings of panic and fear. I get it.

But you’re the kind of person who wants to figure this out, even though life, parenting, work has become a bit of a logistical nightmare.  Have you ever been woken up in the middle of the night before your big day? Were you able to fall back asleep and relax?  It is ok if your answer is “sometimes yes, sometimes no.”

Panic and anxiety come from all kinds of places but you cannot talk your way out of it for good.

This post is not about the causes of panic and anxiety.  It is about how it feels. For me, it comes out in my throat which gets tight.  My chest would get tight too. I would get redfaced and even sometimes my body would shake.  These symptoms or a combination of these symptoms are common.

What I have found to be common regardless of how panic and anxiety feels is that you cannot completely talk you way out of it.

This is true, even if you have a yoga practice or have meditated because while those tools are essential for the tool box of happiness, they often do not go deep enough into the place where panic and anxiety starts.

The answer lies in your belly.  Yup.

In my first lesson on belly breathing, we are going right to the root of where panic and anxiety starts.

Let’s Get Right to it

Today’s Goal: To feel air coming in thru your nostrils (with your mouth closed) when you push out and forward your belly button. You will be exhaling through your mouth.

  • For this first lesson, I’d like you to discover a comfortable posture.
  • Please sit so that your shoulders are over your hips.
  • Place your hands on your hips with your elbows bent but keep your shoulder relaxed and out. Please your hands in a way as a young kid would when they are saying with their body “hey?!” If that image does not help, just place your hands on your hips right above the hip bones.
  • It should be a comfortable feeling.
  • Close your mouth initially and inhale gently through your nose.
  • Now gently exhale thru your mouth.

A Note About Gently: Do Not Snort or Sniffle Your Breath Into Your Nose.  Rather, Pretend you are asleep and you are taking a relaxing pre-sleep breath.

Gently breathe into your nose. Hold for a second and just note where in your body you feel your breath – is it in your nostrils coming in?

Your throat? Your chest? Any chance you feel it on the sides of your body like where you’d feel a corset?

Now, for this lesson I am sitting in a chair that has some give to it so it is easy for my lower back to arch a bit. A chair that has give – like a tilting chair – helps initially so you can use the chair to tilt your pelvis/hips using the chair.  If you are sitting in a firm chair you will need to point and roll your pelvis/hips forward.  I would like you to comfortably roll your pelvis forward and back once or twice. Don’t force your pelvis/hips forward but see if you can get them to rock a bit.

HERE COMES THE BIG TAKEAWAY – PAY ATTENTION

  • With your hands on your hips and your elbows out I’d like you to take a slow inhale thru your nose and at the same time roll your pelvis slowly forward like you are TRYING TO TOUCH YOUR BELLY BUTTON TO THE WALL IN FRONT OF YOU. You can use your hands on your hips to help your pelvis roll forward.
  • Can you roll your pelvis/hips forward in a way that allows your belly to come forward like it is pouring over your belt line?
  • For now, do not worry about what your exhale is like so much but exhale through your mouth when you exhale.
  • I’d like you to inhale as you roll your pelvis forward and focus on slowly trying to touch your belly button forward.

The Goal:

By learning and practicing what is “Belly Breathing,” you will teach your body a deep, calming state of being. Your body will switch to breathing in this fashion because your body and mind seek comfort. Once your body learns this state of breathing, this new way to breathe, you will start off calmer and it will form a foundation for addressing panic. Once you do this for 21 days or so, you will have taught your body how to restore itself, and you to calm.

ARE YOU STILL READING? ARE YOU WONDERING ABOUT HOW THIS WORKS?

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